Some times i feel like why i namee myself as a featherthinker rather i cry at night to let go my pains so that i can feel good for awhile .what ever i suffered, the hurting words or the bahaviour of people.
I miss my every thing which belonged to me in my past and ar present too ohh thats long gone.but i dont pretend it because i dont wanna shiw any of my feelings to any one.by this attitude of me, people think that i have a lot of attitude( negative) am so proudish but the fact is that i dont wanna get hurt any more .i pretend like i dont care ;but but but i care ,i really care and i miss those parsons who were in my past my grand parents especially.
My granny (maternalside)i love her alot still ! She expired when i was in 10th grade.the may month,friday 23rd morning 10 ‘0 clock.
I miss her alot but she wont come back i know 😦 she was too much good a great parsonality ,humble parson .she went away from us and not a single thing that could hurt us if we remember her.you know, good people if they leave us we dont remember them by crying like a kid daily .instead we remember them in our prayers we cry in sublications .we make dua’a for them so that they could get a highest place in jannah (paradise).we dont remember her but sometimes if we remember something relatable to her.i dont take her name usually in any situation .my mother said ,”why dont you miss your granny ?and i think you have lost your memories which you have spend with her”. I was like ;why she said those words (mumbling)and than i replied ,”hmm”because i cant make her to read my diary as i wrote my feelings every thing about my granny in it .
I cant show my weak point to any one they take the advantage of it.people pretend like they care but actually they are like the sand of the jungle.when they ‘ll be in any insecurity i’ll be there for them but when it comes to me no one would come forword.every parson is busy in their own life so, let them be happy and i wanna be happy alone .
Am just waiting for a parson whi would be my buddy as same as me.i kniw that ,”its life”.ups and downs would be there but what about the parsons who are our own but still they are like enemy .
They do many things yes many things but its their reponsibilty to do so but they shouldnt host their names at the top the mountain .they should not make any rules and regulations for children .they should not pressuries us to follow their so called rules etc they hit their rules on our face any make us to follow .
I think you people got that about whom am talking .yes, thats our parents ,relatives and friends.
Since 3 days i am suffering from a severe headache .my mother thats obvious she care for me .actually in the evening when i was writing my blogs on the paper .my dad was going out of the house he said,”what did you ate shonu”.my mum replied shonu is suffering from headache but my dad ‘s answer was headache!!! No, headache is nothing that you would suffer from .its just that you dont wanna learn more you are just learning some part to score marks that’s it .eat an apple daily headacbe would be no more.by saying this he went away.
I was shocked by those words i mean i didnt expect these type of words from my parents like really i can’t.
I didn’t even replied him any thing not even when he asked about what ihad in the evening.
A little drop of water in my eye (left eye) i cant help but ignore those things .
I dont know whether he said those things in any frustation or it was favourable thing for or any thing else i dont know understand .i have no idea about it beacuse i am like a” yolk in the egg “.my mother use to say this to me .
This was like the sand of the jungle for me.i dont know i think that i took this very seriously that i shouldnt do that.huh!
At the end
We dont need any enemy .well, actually we already have them.yeah! Our own known members so called as friends or relatives or with whom we live.who pretend like they care but actually they don’t .
This was my story what i think about peoples with whom i live .
live for yourself.
dont forget who you are and where you belongs to.